6 Ways to Help A New Mom and What to Bring Her
It’s the million dollar question isn’t it? My friend just had a baby, what should I bring her?
It’s really hard for moms to ask for help, it’s just not in our nature to have you bring over dinner, to take the older kids to give me a break (even if you said you would), to go grocery shopping or clean the house. No mother EVER feels comfortable making that phone call or sending that text. The text that actually takes you up on your offer.
So don’t ask, just do. This post is full of the best advice with the top 6 ways to help a new mom and what to bring her after bringing a new baby home. Follow this list and you’re SURE to be her new favorite visitor.
#1 Spruce Up The Kitchen
There’s nothing like walking into a clean kitchen. Even if the rest of your house is a mess, a clean kitchen can make a world of difference. Go wipe off all the counters, empty the sink, unload and load the dishwasher, sweep and run a steam mop over the floors if you can.
The last thing a new mom is worried about is cleaning up after breakfast, doing the dishes after lunch and putting leftovers away after dinner. Chances are, the counters are covered with food, utensils and trash. Clear it up for her. She’ll thank you a million.
#2 Bring Food
This might sound obvious, but bring FOOD! Now, there’s a few ways to do this. Some new moms are totally open to visitors, great! But some moms just want some peace and quiet to spend time bonding with their new little bundle of joy. They might want to hold off on new visitors, and that’s OKAY.
If she says it’s okay to stop by and meet the new baby (yay), ask her what she’s craving and pick it up on your way over. If she says, ‘that’s fine’ or ‘I’m not hungry’… I urge you to still go pick something up. New moms have such a hard time asking for help and 9 times out of 10, won’t tell you to bring anything even if you offer.
So do it anyway. Bring something she can heat up later, maybe she’s not hungry right now, but she will be later and cooking is the last thing on your mind when you’re figuring out your new routine with the babe. Something like a casserole, enchiladas, pasta, soup, etc.
Now if she doesn’t want visitors right now, no problem. Make your favorite dish, stop and grab a burger and fries or order a pizza (text her to let her know it’s coming) and drop it off on her front porch. Be sure to bring something she can heat up and eat later. She might have dinner figured out tonight… but you could be a life saver for tomorrow.
Just leave it on her front porch, then text her and let her know it’s there. Why not knock? If you knock and hand deliver it, she might feel obligated to ask you to come in and chat for a bit, when all she wants to do is rest. Just a quick drop off is best.
#3 Run Some Errands
Text her the day before you’re coming, or an hour before you’re heading to her house. Ask he if she needs anything. Even if this isn’t the case… tell her you’re stopping by the store before you head over and pick a few things up for her.
Ask if she needs, toilet paper, milk, drink, bread, dog food, etc. If she knows you’re already going to the store (and not making a stop just for her), she’ll feel less of a nuisance and more likely to really tell you what she needs.
#4 Take The Kids
If she has older kids, offer to take them off her hands for an hour or even better… an afternoon. With a new baby and kids running around, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and need a break. if you say, ‘let me know if I can take the kids’… 9 times out of 10 she’ll never take you up on it. We just don’t feel comfortable hitting up our friends and saying, ‘hey remember when you said you’d take my kids, well can you take them today?’ it’s just not in our nature.
So here’s a little secret… instead of offering. Just do it. Text her something like, ‘hey we’re going to see the new Minions movie at 2 and thought we’d come get Allie and Koda to come with us’. She’s 100 times more likely to say, ‘that would be great’.
Trust me, this is the BEST thing you can do for w new mom with older siblings.
#5 Give Her A Break
When you’re there visiting the new baby, offer to take the baby for a walk (or even just to hold him for a bit) and give her some time to take a shower (or bath).
If she looks like she could use some sleep (I mean what mother couldn’t), change the baby’s diaper, change her clothes (if needed), and tuck mom and baby into bed letting them rest. Sneak away and go do a load of laundry for her.
Burp cloths and baby clothes stack up those first few weeks of bringing baby home. Throw ‘em in the washer… it’s one less thing for her to worry about.
#6 Bring Mom Something
Balloons, flowers, baby toys, baby clothes… everyone loves bringing a gift for the new little one. But no one ever thinks about mom. She just went through labor and delivery, the most physically draining thing she’ll ever do in her life. We think mom deserves a little something too.
Some warm comfy slippers, a new cute and comfy robe (because she’ll be living in it the next few days), some bath bombs, her favorite bag of chips, etc.
Trust me, out of all the gifts she’ll receive from friends and family… she’ll remember yours the most.